today is one of my favorite days...

but first, let's process #feminism

Today is International Women’s Day, and it’s a day that I look forward to for weeks. I don’t quite know why. But you see, while it’s all good and well (or simple + good?) to celebrate being a feminist who shouts out, “I am a woman and women’s issues matter to me now more than ever,” unfortunately, the more I’ve come to know, the more problematic it all becomes, and the more careful I have to be about how, exactly, I choose to honor this day.

So here goes it:

I am a cis-gendered, white, able-bodied, straight woman living a very privileged middle-class life, simply because of how lucky I am to have been born into a loving and supportive suburban family and married to a man whose own family made a very good investment in now financially-untouchable land in the most wealthy county in Tennessee.

I am the sole employee of a woman-owned business that serves many other women, therefore I work in an environment that is not only safe and fair, but incredibly inspiring and encouraging. I am lucky to say that I have never been harassed, abused, or worse. I have freedom, and even though I worry a lot about what will come of our reproductive rights in this country, I unfortunately must admit that my white privileged body does not have to face the same fears and mistrust that other marginalized female bodies might.

Yes, I struggle with my mental health.

Yes, I have worries and struggles that a man does not.

But I am actually pretty fine. Looking inward, I have a lot to be grateful for. Looking outward, I could stand to notice more.

This day, and this month, is about honoring women’s history, their contributions, and their stories. But the lens is widening. Women aren’t just people like me. Women are everywhere. And a lot of women are dealing with issues that I can’t even imagine.

Lately, I’ve been diving into the term “white feminism,” which for those of you who don’t know, involves the increasing trend of only recognizing feminist issues that primarily benefit white, middle-to-upper class cisgender straight women. To be a “feminist” today often looks a lot like breaking the glass ceiling, demanding equal pay, expressing body positivity (while still playing to a homogenized ideal of beauty - because you gotta look good to sell empowerment), buying a trendy t-shirt, and hashtagging the word on a selfie.

Personally, I tend to express my Girl Power side by holding preference for music, books, podcasts, businesses, and social accounts created and run by women, and getting upset when the CMA Fest lineup only features 4 women on their main stage. (Seriously, how dare they?)

But it should all be about so much more.

I’m still learning, so I don’t have all the facts, but breaking the trend of what is now a commercialized feminism involves acknowledging that -while it can be hard for us here in the U.S. - it’s even more difficult to live, to speak, to move freely under a restrictive religion or culture. It involves recognizing the sweatshop workers around the world who are dying to make our fast-fashion clothing at an affordable rate. It requires noticing that there are women right here in this country who can’t afford food for their children, who don’t have access to clean water, who can’t safely leave an abusive spouse, or walk down the street, or have their medical needs met. It involves the fact that race is still an issue - and a feminist one, at that. It involves admitting that not all women are born women, or want to identify as such.

It involves feeling anger, not pity.

But first, it simply involves knowing. And listening. And really, truly, hearing.

This week, I started reading a book by Mikki Kendall called Hood Feminism: Notes from Women that a Movement Forgot. And after just the first few pages, I found myself wondering, What the heck am I supposed to do? While I wish I had more knowledge to impart today, I figured this was the best place to start: being vulnerable and sharing what little I know while I continue to grow so that maybe you’ll feel inspired to start learning, acknowledging, and speaking, too.

Today is a fun day of pretty, inspiring messages on Instagram and fun girl power anthems. But it’s also a day for reflection. For gratitude. And for taking the first steps towards something new.

Ladies, enjoy your day. Eat a piece of cake without worrying about your waistline. Listen to some Lizzo. And then, get inspired. And get angry. (Or perhaps, share this post?)

In the meantime, here are a few fun girl power anthems to get you going: